We’d all like to pretend that our spirit animal would be something cool, but no. This, this is my spirit animal. He gets stressed out whenever someone leaves the room, he gets stressed out whenever someone enters the room, he sounds like he’s being murdered if you pick up your keys, he whines pathetically to be picked up and put on the couch though we both know he can jump up himself, if someone goes to the kitchen he immediately runs to you and looks up at you pleading not to let him starve, if you pet any other animal he droops like you’ve forgotten he exists, he does not cope well with change, can not sleep without his comfort toys, he does not cope well with anything, he whimpers in his sleep.
He is the embodiment of my id. The pathetic pathetic embodiment of my id.
Jeremy Norman’s ongoing History of Information project has a neat way of showing content, dividing subjects into eras and themes, and if you go through for a browse, you’re sure to catch your eye on something interesting.
this sounds like it can only go badly for me
Feeling time terminology to be imbalanced, Kramer insists on referring to the periods between afternoons and nights as “oddings” on days not divisible by two.
George invites a date back to his apartment for dinner with the intention of seducing her, but to his horror, when they arrive, he realizes that he forgot to purchase any ingredients. He desperately scrambles to make her something using the only things he has available: mustard, two Kraft singles, some cream cheese, half a dozen eggs, and a carton of week-old Chinese leftovers. When he presents her the disgusting mess he managed to fuse together in the pan, it proves indistinguishable from her ensuing vomit.
When Elaine dates a man with only a right arm and Jerry dates a woman with only a left arm, they both give up on their potential relationships to set the two up with each other, solely for the sake of symmetry. When Kramer finds out about what they’ve done, he can’t decide whether to be annoyed or thrilled.
yes yes good
also I reached 200 followers overnight - I’d say I hope you all like puns, but I’m going to take the leap and assume that you do. so, hope you like drunk blogging about art history and mad men!
i’m really excited about this post guys, it’s off to a slow start but i think it’s going places
puns, florida, meth, it has everything
breaking news: Britney Spears owns a fucking washing machine
if I’m ever famous I’m going to get a bunch of copies of the same outfit and I’m going to wear it every single time I go out in public in any kind of unofficial capacity
"Billy where is your homework?"
"im sorry Ms. Klein my dog- *sees dog in the window make a throat cutting motion* -gone cat ate it”